Your Confidence Tip of the Day: Become an expert in managing expectations. Yours, that is.

During my long reign as Queen of Confidence I have witnessed many triumphs and tragedies of confidence played out before my wondering eyes. Periodically I’ll be sharing what I hope shall be regarded as pithy insights which are intended to act as cautionary tales and inspirational anecdotes as well as practical tools for improving one’s own sense of confidence. You’ll also find powerful questions, confidence tasks and useful affirmations included from time to time, meant to enhance your own sense of confidence. These tips will be shared sporadically, as the inspiration moves me. Keep coming back, because you never know what I’ll say. So there. Neener.

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Many of life’s keenest disappointments come from unmet expectations.

After all, it is rarely reality that in and of itself disappoints. Instead, it is when our expectations are not met that we experience the greatest disappointment. We make up these stories about how it will be when X happens, and then when X fails to materialize, we are disproportionally crushed in relation to what actually happened. We let ourselves become so invested in the form of our expectations that it feels like reality crushes us under the weight of our unmet expectations.

The lesson is not, as you might at this point surmise, to lower your expectations, but rather to separate your emotional investment in the expectations from the eventual outcome. Be willing to find the gifts in the unexpected outcomes. Frequently, they exceed our former expectations anyway.

In short, dream big and expect a miracle. Do not expect it to come true in precisely the way you envision. Instead, become enthralled with the anticipation of good things to come, and set aside your attachment to the forms in which your miracles appear. Most likely, they will not fit your original pictures. This is a wonderful thing, because you cannot ever dream bigger than the Universe loves you.

What did you expect?

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Molly Burke CPCC MSU
Queen of Confidence (click to become a facebook fan)
www.lifepurposeworks.com
“I’ve bottled confidence and you can, too!”

This is a series of posts for which I lacked a decent Google-searchable keyword title. Searching Google for ideas produced, “PEARLS of WISDOM”, which has such a rich flavor of hubris and chuzpah that I just HAD to use it. It makes me laugh at myself with delight and a bit of wry sarcasm. Enjoy!

In Part One of this short series, I talked about my passion for perseverance in Purpose. And, I left you, gentle readers, hanging. Wait no longer. Here then, as promised, is the conclusion of “Quitting before the miracle”.

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HERE’S THE COOL PART:

This self awareness is not peculiar to me. Over and over I see confused, uncertain people leave their Life Purpose session or one of my Life Purpose Discovery seminars lit up, transformed by the natural clarity of Purpose.

Some are awe-struck by the scope and splendor of their unique Life Purpose. Some get giddy. Some grow thoughtful and deeply introspective. Others express a sense of “I always suspected it was something like this, but now I know for sure”.

It’s this inner knowing that confers for some people the first feelings of true courage they’ve ever really felt. And I dare anyone to witness these realizations in person without being deeply moved. When I see what this knowing does for people, I want to bring that level of confidence and surety to everyone. It’s one of the best things ever.

It takes courage to be true to yourself and to what you know is right. It takes courage to claim one’s birthright, brilliance, gifts, talents, mad skills. It takes courage to admit when you’re wrong, when you’ve erred, when you’ve failed to do as you said. It takes great courage to stay your course when those around you doubt. Confidence is born of adherence to one’s own inner clarity and sense of direction. This kind of confidence is born of Purpose.

What is the source of your confidence?

Molly Burke CPCC MSU
Queen of Confidence
www.lifepurposeworks.com
“I’ve bottled confidence and you can, too!”

During my long reign as Queen of Confidence I have witnessed many triumphs and tragedies of confidence played out before my eyes. Periodically I’ll be sharing what I hope shall be pithy insights which are intended to act as cautionary tales and inspirational anecdotes as well as practical tools for improving one’s own sense of confidence.   You’ll also find powerful questions, confidence tasks and useful affirmations included from time to time, meant to enhance your own sense of confidence. These tips will be shared sporadically, as the inspiration moves me. Keep coming back, because you never know what I’ll say. So there. Neener.

Your Confidence Tip of the Day:

To succeed, learn to fail well. What this means is to wring every possible piece of learning and wisdom you can from every challenging experience and unexpected outcome. In this way, mistakes become a natural building block for greater confidence. You can create stellar opportunities of gold from the dross of mistakes well made, if you are willing to become humble and learn. It’s not the mistake that really matters, you see; it’s how you use it to forward yourself and your dearest dreams.

And more important than everything is this: resilience. Cultivating resilience enables you to move forward meaningfully and with renewed vigor after a set back. As Rev. Douglass Fitch says, “A setback is just a set up for a comeback.” Amen.

To quote General George Patton, “I don’t measure a man’s success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom.”

How high do you bounce?

Molly Burke CPCC MSU
Queen of Confidence
www.lifepurposeworks.com
“I’ve bottled confidence and you can, too!”

This is a series of posts for which I lacked a decent Google-searchable keyword title. Searching Google for ideas produced, “PEARLS of WISDOM”, which has such a rich flavor of hubris and chuzpah that I just HAD to use it. It makes me laugh at myself with delight and a bit of wry sarcasm. Enjoy!

Some months ago I was talking to my one of my best friends, who was expressing dismay at my dogged determination to try yet again, to put myself out there and potentially risk my home and security in the process. Impassioned, I exclaimed, “I don’t want to live a safe little life. I HAD a safe little life, it damn near killed me. I don’t want to quit before the miracle. All around me people quit before their miracles and end up wondering, ‘what if?’. Not me, not me. I just can’t live like that anymore. I just can’t.” Tears poured down my face.

It’s true. I just can’t give up on my dreams for me, and for you all. A lit up world full of purpose-filled people is my dream, and I know that, despite how things might look right now, it’s all gonna work out better than fine for all of us. I know it in my bones.

It’s that “in the bones” knowing that spurs me on, that prods me off the couch and into the office, that gets me on the phone making the formerly tough calls (it gets easier). The knowing makes me edit this book I’m trying to finish, to stretch myself, to be uncomfortable but wildly fulfilled.

A Purpose driven life is not for the faint of heart. It takes courage and clarity and faith in oneself. It takes confidence.

Now how the hell do you get those, fercrissakes? Courage and faith and clarity, that is. I get mine every day from knowing my own personal Life Purpose. It may sound corny (and I frankly don’t care if it does, corny suits me), but knowing why I’m here and what I’m about makes all the difference for me. It’s given me access to inner resources I didn’t know I had.

Are you living “on Purpose”?

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Come back to read the next part of this series, entitled, “Here’s the Cool Part”

Molly Burke CPCC MSU
Queen of Confidence
www.lifepurposeworks.com
“I’ve bottled confidence, and you can, too!”

During my long reign as Queen of Confidence I have witnessed many triumphs and tragedies of confidence played out before my eyes. Periodically I’ll be sharing what I hope shall be pithy insights which are intended to act as cautionary tales and inspirational anecdotes as well as practical tools for improving one’s own sense of [...]

During my long reign as Queen of Confidence I have witnessed many triumphs and tragedies of confidence played out before me. Periodically I’ll be sharing what I hope shall be pithy insights which are intended to act as cautionary tales and inspirational anecdotes as well as practical tools for improving one’s own sense of confidence. [...]

Saturday day was tough. I was to attend a Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) celebration across the Bay that evening, but somewhere along the way I got lost in my own personal Spin Cycle.
I found out the evening before the party that the preferred attire was a floaty white cotton skirt/dress motif. [...]